Terrible Puns One Liners That Will Make You Laugh And Groan

Terrible Puns One Liners for Guaranteed Giggles are here to prove that being “so bad it’s good” is a real art form! These delightfully awful puns will make you groan, laugh, and maybe even roll your eyes all at once.

Perfect for sharing with friends, coworkers, or anyone who appreciates the fine balance between cringe and comedy.

With our easy copy and share buttons, you can spread the laughter instantly on WhatsApp or social media. If you’re looking to break the ice or lighten the mood, these terrible one-liners are guaranteed to deliver giggles every time!

Best terrible puns you cannot ignore

These are the best terrible puns that always get a reaction. They are short, punchy and designed to make people laugh while rolling their eyes.

• I am reading a book about anti-gravity. It is impossible to put down.
  
• I used to be a baker but I could not make enough dough.
  
• I asked the librarian if the library had books about paranoia. She whispered they are right behind you.
  
• I was going to tell you a joke about construction but I am still working on it.
  
• My math teacher called me average. How mean.
  
• I used to hate facial hair but then it grew on me.
  
• I would tell you a chemistry joke but I know I would not get a reaction.
  
• I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.
  
• I do not trust stairs because they are always up to something.
  
• I asked my dog what two minus two is. He said nothing.
  
• I used to be addicted to soap but I am clean now.
  
• I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.
  
• I was wondering why the frisbee kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
  
• I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.
  
• I am afraid of the calendar. Its days are numbered.
  

Funny but terrible puns that win hearts

Funny but terrible puns are the guilty pleasure of humor lovers. They are ridiculous yet perfect to lighten up any gathering.

• I do not play soccer because I do not enjoy being kicked around.
  
• I used to play piano by ear but now I use my hands.
  
• I told my computer I needed a break. Now it will not stop sending me KitKat ads.
  
• I once swallowed a dictionary. It gave me thesaurus throat ever.
  
• I called my boss to say I am running late. He asked me to stop jogging and get in the office.
  
• I used to have a job crushing cans. It was soda pressing.
  
• I burned 2000 calories yesterday. I forgot to take the pizza out of the oven.
  
• I wanted to be a barber but I just could not cut it.
  
• I used to sell Velcro but it was a total rip off.
  
• I told my friend ten jokes to make him laugh. Sadly no pun in ten did.
  
• I got locked out of the music store. I had to find the right key.
  
• I do not trust elevators. They are always up to something.
  
• I wanted to tell a time traveling joke but you did not like it.
  
• I lost my mood ring. I do not know how I feel about it.
  
• I know a lot of jokes about retired people but none of them work.
  

Absolutely terrible puns to make you cringe

Absolutely terrible puns are so-bad-they’re-funny comedy gold. This list of terrible puns proves that eye-roll humor has its own charm.

• I tried to catch fog yesterday. Mist.
  
• I once had a job at a calendar factory but I got fired for taking a day off.
  
• I used to date an electrician. She was the light of my life.
  
• I dropped out of the kleptomaniacs club. We kept taking things literally.
  
• I cannot believe I got fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off.
  
• I was going to look for my missing watch but I never found the time.
  
• I gave all my dead batteries away. Free of charge.
  
• I broke my arm in two places. My doctor told me to stop going to those places.
  
• I stayed up all night to find out where the wind was going. Then it blew me away.
  
• I do not buy shoes from drug dealers. I do not know what they laced them with.
  
• I used to be a banker but I lost interest.
  
• I once knew a guy who collected candy canes. They were all in mint condition.
  
• I tried to write with a broken pencil. It was pointless.
  
• I once had a joke about paper but it was tearable.
  
• I am on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it.
  

Ivan the terrible puns that spark laughter

Ivan the terrible puns mix history with ridiculous one-liners. They are a clever twist for fans of wordplay.

• Ivan the Terrible hated math. He could not handle the czar-dination.
  
• Ivan the Terrible tried gardening. He could not handle the czar-rot crops.
  
• Ivan the Terrible opened a coffee shop. He called it Czar-bucks.
  
• Ivan the Terrible never used pencils. He preferred czar-pens.
  
• Ivan the Terrible joined a music band. He played the czar-drums.
  
• Ivan the Terrible opened a zoo. It was called the Czar-safari.
  
• Ivan the Terrible made a bakery. His specialty was czar-dough.
  
• Ivan the Terrible wrote poetry. He was the czar-tist.
  
• Ivan the Terrible went to the dentist. He needed a czar-d filling.
  
• Ivan the Terrible started a clothing line. He made czar-digans.
  
• Ivan the Terrible once tried comedy. He was the czar of bad jokes.
  
• Ivan the Terrible had a horse. He named it Czarlie.
  
• Ivan the Terrible tried ice skating. He was the czar of blades.
  
• Ivan the Terrible became a chef. His favorite was czar-dines.
  
• Ivan the Terrible opened a market. He sold czar-mel apples.
  

Sans terrible puns that gamers love

Sans terrible puns are iconic for fans of gaming humor. These one liners mix quirky fun with groan-worthy jokes.

• Sans said bones are humerus.
  
• Sans loves coffee because it is grounds for celebration.
  
• Sans tried gardening. He really dug it.
  
• Sans joined the orchestra. He played the trom-bone.
  
• Sans started a bakery. He made skele-buns.
  
• Sans told his brother he found a jaw-dropping deal.
  
• Sans wanted to become a comedian. It was in his bones.
  
• Sans got a job at a graveyard. People were dying to get in.
  
• Sans studied anatomy. He got straight A bones.
  
• Sans loves Halloween. It is bone-chilling fun.
  
• Sans tried boxing. He had a bone to pick.
  
• Sans loves math. He is good with skele-tons.
  
• Sans joined a dance class. He did the bone-shuffle.
  
• Sans started a pizza shop. It was skele-icious.
  
• Sans was asked to tell a joke. He said bone-appetite.
  

Funny terrible puns about puns

Terrible puns about puns are the ultimate dad joke humor. They are a playful twist on wordplay itself.

• I made a pun about wind but it blows.
  
• I made a pun about paper but it is tearable.
  
• I made a pun about butter but it spread too thin.
  
• I made a pun about electricity but it shocked everyone.
  
• I made a pun about plants but it leaves people confused.
  
• I made a pun about fish but it was off the scale.
  
• I made a pun about time but it was past tense.
  
• I made a pun about math but it did not add up.
  
• I made a pun about cheese but it was too cheesy.
  
• I made a pun about elevators but it did not lift the mood.
  
• I made a pun about shoes but it had no sole.
  
• I made a pun about music but it fell flat.
  
• I made a pun about gardening but it was groundless.
  
• I made a pun about water but it was watered down.
  
• I made a pun about food but it did not taste funny.
  

The most terrible puns ever recorded

These are the most terrible puns ever and they show how bad jokes can be timeless classics. They are groaner jokes at their peak.

• I once wrote a song about tortillas. It was a wrap.
  
• I used to be a banker but I lost interest.
  
• I used to be a train driver but I went off track.
  
• I got hit in the head with a can of soda. Luckily it was a soft drink.
  
• I gave away all my pencils. No point anymore.
  
• I once had a joke about pizza but it was too cheesy.
  
• I once fell into a painting. I am now framed.
  
• I gave away my vacuum cleaner. It was just gathering dust.
  
• I told my doctor I broke my arm in two places. He told me to stop going to those places.
  
• I called my friend who was a carpenter. He nailed the conversation.
  
• I once had a shoe business but it had no sole.
  
• I was addicted to brake fluid but I can stop anytime.
  
• I lost my left arm. I am all right now.
  
• I used to be a baker but I loafed around.
  
• I called the electrician to fix my light. He gave a shocking performance.
  

Funny but terrible puns Reddit fans adore

Terrible puns Reddit fans love are those crowd favorites that keep threads alive with cheesy one-liners.

• I asked the gym instructor if he could teach me splits. He replied how flexible are you?”
  
• I tried to start a hide and seek club but it never took off.
  
• I told my boss I need a raise. He said my performance is under review.
  
• I opened a bakery but it turned into a crumby business.
  
• I said no to drugs once. I feel better now.
  
• I used to work at a blanket factory but it folded.
  
• I tried to be a photographer but I could not focus.
  
• I started a hot air balloon business but it never took off.
  
• I tried to be an actor but I could not play the part.
  
• I was a banker once but I lost interest.
  
• I got fired from the orange juice company. I could not concentrate.
  
• I tried to write a play but it was too dramatic.
  
• I bought a boat but it sank my savings.
  
• I was a gardener but my business got rooted out.
  
• I once joined the navy but I was at sea.
  

A list of terrible puns for every mood

This list of terrible puns covers a wide mix of dumb jokes and silly wordplay. These one liners fit any mood and situation.

• I ate a clock yesterday. It was very time consuming.
  
• I was a math teacher but I had too many problems.
  
• I used to run a shoe shop but it had no sole.
  
• I gave up on my job at the coffee shop. It was a grind.
  
• I called my friend a chef but he did not have the right recipe.
  
• I started a candle business but it quickly burned out.
  
• I wanted to learn karate but I could not kick the habit.
  
• I used to paint but I lost my brush with success.
  
• I joined a choir but I could not sing the right note.
  
• I tried being a farmer but I could not make ends meet.
  
• I was a barber but I cut corners.
  
• I got fired from the clock factory. I kept wasting time.
  
• I bought a dictionary but it had no meaning.
  
• I started a car business but I drove it into the ground.
  
• I was a waiter but I could not carry it off.
  

Funny terrible puns one liners for quick laughs

Terrible puns one liner are the fastest way to make someone laugh. They are short, sharp, and groan-worthy.

• I stayed up all night wondering where the stars went. Then it dawned on me.
  
• I used to be a teacher but I lost my class.
  
• I joined a gym but it did not work out.
  
• I got locked out of my house so I had to call a locksmith. He made a key point.
  
• I ate too much seafood. Now I am feeling eel.
  
• I once had a joke about candy but it was a jawbreaker.
  
• I used to be a fisherman but I lost my reel job.
  
• I started a music band but it fell flat.
  
• I bought a pair of shoes from a drug dealer. I do not know what they laced them with but I have been tripping all day.
  
• I used to play soccer but I kept getting kicked out.
  
• I was going to buy a boat but it was too much of a ferry tale.
  
• I made a pencil with two erasers. It was pointless.
  
• I used to run marathons but I stopped running my mouth.
  
• I started a bakery but it went stale fast.
  
• I was a chef once but my skills soured.
  

Conclusion

Terrible puns one liners are proof that jokes do not need to be perfect to be entertaining. They are groan-worthy yet unforgettable and always a hit in casual conversations. The best part is how these awful puns bring people together with simple laughter and playful eye-roll humor. Keep this collection handy and use the copy button to spread the fun easily with your friends in the USA.